Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Spam you very much

Happy Friday Everyone. While you are wasting time on the internet make sure to head over to Dad Blogs for Fatherhood Friday. Great bloggers are found it right after you read mine!

What Now?

As a little Internet experiment I am going to post the subject line of the next few spam emails I get, with my own commentary of course. While I absolutely hate getting spam, I sometimes find the subject lines to be very entertaining, I hope you do too.

ADD POWER TO YOUR HUSBAND\'S HAMMER - I don't have a husband, and if I did I don't know how powerful I would want his hammer to be...sounds dangerous!

Magic stick - Is this some Harry Potter promotion or something? My wife is the HP fan, maybe I should see if she needs the Magic stick?

Do You Honestly Think You'll Be Able To Ever Retire? - Boy, I hope so. Maybe I should quit my Starbucks addiction, that should help.

Pick your free 800% BONUS - Now we're talking! This should help me retire...suck on that emailer from before!

your score has been updated - What score...what did I miss? It's really hard to win if you don't know someone is keeping score or what it's been updated too? I hope this doesn't mess up my 800% bonus!

Bring your manhood to an unbelievable level - Don't all guys want girls to believe the unbelievable when it comes to their manhood? Me, I like working with the believable so nobody gets let down.

Discover the reliable source of cheap and quality drugs - First off, nice English! I am surprised the manager of this supplier for good, inexpensive drugs let this email fly out the door before proofreading it. I bet it hurts their business to have such poor work come from their employees.

If you have a huge stick, women will never tell you to get out of bed - Unless this huge stick can start the coffee, make breakfast, get the kids ready for school and take the dog for a walk my wife will not be allowed to stay in bed.

Find cheap alternative to expensive American medications - I think I've just uncovered the solution to our health care problem!

Fox News are liers - When did the White House start spamming, and do they know about the cheap alternatives to expensive American medications?

Get a deal on your own dance floor - Thank God, I can't tell you how expensive your own dance floor can be, and these Jazz hands aren't working on the linoleum so well.

10.31% off Halloweeeeeeeeeen Sale on Car Swag - This is such a better deal then the lousy 10% you usually get on Halloweeeeeeeeen Car Swag!

Enjoy your day everyone!



  1. It's almost 2 a.m. and I'm laughing my backside off! (I know, shhhhhhhh, you'll wake the sleeping sick child-mine.) Manhood, dance floors, lying news channels, sales and sticks. You've got it all!

  2. Hilarious...I'm a little annoyed as my spam about the Bonus was only 675%...WTF...Good stuff, had me laughing.

  3. What is even scarier than that is there are people that fall for this stuff out there. I'd like their names and address, personally. I've got some wonderful waterfront property in arizona to sell them.