wrapping my head around it all

So this is my 40th post...and the only thought in my head is why am I doing this? The next thought is why am I even questioning myself. For as long as humans have roamed the earth men have served as the hunter and provider for their families. If men could not fill this role then what was their purpose? In my family my wife and I have both served this role, with her making as much if not a little more than me with every move we have made. But, like so many other Americans the balance of provider power has shifted to the woman's side. I struggle with feeling like I am not providing like I should plus the guilt with my wife having to carry the burden of being the "almost" sole provider, even though she has told me (as recent at 5 minuets ago in fact) that she is happy with our set up, she likes me spending more time with our girls and not having them in 9 hour day care/school. She has encouraged me to start this blog, to branch out, to think way outside the box of ways to contribute. Is my skull that thick? Is the over inflation of the male ego for the past hundred decades plus brainwashing me to fight this? I have another possible job interview and again I am second guessing myself. WHY??? I have life so good right now. Why does this shit drive me bat shit crazy (Nickleback lyric). I don't know, but what I do know is that I need to start listening to my wife more when it comes to my direction in life. She is the smartest person I know and cares the most for me so I better pay attention to her opinion. I am also going to work the piss out of this blogging thing...but I'm going to need help. I already have found a great resource with Dad Blogs and a couple other great dad blog sites. I need to embrace my new working life, and tell that male ego to shut it! I'm also going to pass on that job interview. It's not a job I want, and I know it's one I don't need. It's part-time-stay-at-home status for this dad....watch out!

PEACE OUT DADS!!!